COVID Love Song
(tune: Running Bear by Johnny Preston)
In the deep red Texas lived Billy Bob, young besotted swain,
While in New York, far away, was his beloved Marilou Jane.
From the blue state, she would not travel, nor have him come to her.
During COVID to see each other, they zoomed to confer.
Marilou Jane loved Billy Bob
With a love over the ‘net.
Billy Bob loved Marilou Jane
With needs that were unmet.
He couldn’t fly across the country ‘cause most flights were disallowed.
For his Marilou Jane he would have bravely faced any crowd,
But Marilou Jane would not risk it, ‘though so lonely at home;
During COVID in her blue state, from seclusion she would not roam.
Marilou Jane loved Billy Bob
With a love over the ‘net.
Billy Bob loved Marilou Jane
With needs that were unmet.
Billy Bob drove from Texas, Marilou Jane did not stir;
No lockdowns or regulations would stop him reaching her.
When he got there, he proposed marriage outside her door,
But she said, “Without long distance, I can’t love you anymore.”
Billy Bob loved Marilou Jane
With a love over the ‘net.
Marilou Jane loved Billy Bob
Only if they never met.
Give Me Patience
Oh, please, give me patience,
As soon as possible,
To get me through my day.
Or a steady cadence,
If that’s impossible,
To hold boredom at bay.
What’s next, I seem to ask,
With too much frequency,
As the hours slowly pass.
I hate to end a task,
Fighting delinquency
And my idle morass.
Endless life of leisure,
Unkind backhanded curse,
Appears to be my doom.
Here to get my pleasure,
Writing a silly verse,
And never leave this room.
Dragon Under My Bed
When I was young a dragon lived under my bed;
His name was Fwenderyll, but I just called him Fred.
He was an ancient fellow as dragons grow,
For they shrink as they age, as you may not yet know.
When the world was still new, ‘though not as new as he,
He emerged from lava alongside the South Sea.
In form, he was a lump of ten or twelve tons;
Even dragon moms can’t recognize newborn sons.
Slowly his stony shell filled with volcanic gas,
Adding shape and volume but without much more mass.
To float on molten rock, then to lift in the air,
With mighty wings sprouting to get him here to there.
“Aw, the glory!” Fred would sigh when he told me his tale,
“Around the world, in the turn of the moon, to sail.”
But with his first great roar, a dragon learns his fate,
With loss of heat and gases, he begins to deflate.
Oh, there are ways to add to one’s longevity;
Good diet, shed some weight, to fight off brevity.
A smart dragon can last a good long while or two
If, early on, he can learn the tricks he must do.
So, indeed, Fred watched the dinosaurs come and go;
He also ate two or three each week, don’t you know.
He would not eat an unicorn - it didn’t feel right -
But he liked to eat a mammoth every night.
But such snacks went extinct, so Fred became more lean,
And as prey were his size, they appeared twice as mean.
Fred shrank more and became a vegetarian;
That gave him gas with diet so agrarian.
He no longer had to fly and so gave up his wings.
He took up art and books, and other earthbound things.
He claimed to have studied ethics with old Plato
And taught him how to look only at the shadow.
I admit I often did not grasp all Fred said
As a mere lad with a dragon under my bed.
But if you check tonight and see one under yours,
Be kind, share a cookie, and enjoy his wild tours.
THINKING, FAST and SLOW
Daniel Kahneman wrote a book
Into our brains to take a look.
I might believe his words too quick
If System 2 doesn’t get a kick.
Is “what you see is all there is”
Enough for you to solve the quiz?
Why wake your lazy, slower mate
When you do not need to debate?
We will recognize what is there
And give what is not little care.
We can still chew gum while we walk;
We guess and explain ‘til we balk.
Past our bias comes a creeping doubt;
We start to check our story out.
A bit of math, a few more facts,
Enough to let our minds relax.
Or perhaps more deeply we focus
In our flow of hocus-pocus.
Perhaps outside our little scheme
We recall the general theme.
But when into such thought we sink,
Econ or Human do we think?
Will rational sense make the choice,
Or will we hear emotion’s voice?
When later this book I recall,
I surely won’t remember all.
Perhaps I might read it again,
If I forget the mental strain.
My flaws, I guess, are good to know,
‘Though I wonder how much they show.
Likely more to your sight than mine
Around which they secretly entwine.
Thanks for the recommendation
About our mental gyration.
I may see the world as the same,
But now my mistakes have a name.
It's My Party
(Trump Victory Song)
It’s my party and I’ll lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
You should lie too if I am to like you
Nobody knows where Mitch and Mitt have gone
But Susan left the same time.
Was Nancy holding their hands
When they are supposed to be mine?
It’s my party and I’ll lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
You should lie too if I am to like you
They played all the clips about my Big Lie,
Showed the patriots going wild.
But my friends sided with me,
So now I am not exiled
It’s my party and I’ll lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
You should lie too if I am to like you
Kamala and Joe just walked through the door
Like a queen and her puppet king
Oh, what an election surprise
She’s wearing my royal ring.
It’s my party and I’ll lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
Lie if I want to
You should lie too or I’m coming for you
Dems’ Turn to Cry
(Trump Triumphant Trumpetting)
‘Cause now it’s the Dems turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Party has come back to me.
Aww, when Congress impeached with some from my party
And denied my rights as king,
I shut down and almost couldn’t lie;
Now that was a foolish thing.
‘Cause now it’s the Dems turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Party has come back to me.
Well, it hurt me so to see them jumping ship
I felt like making a scene.
All of my lies fell on deaf ears
‘Cause those RINOs were so mean.
But now it’s the Dems turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Party has come back to me.
Oh, when I saw them kissing up to the Dems
Said I can ride in other boats.
The Grand Old Poobahs thought better
‘Cause they know I have the votes.
So now it’s the Dems turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Dems’ turn to cry
The Party has come back to me.
Now I Own You
(Trump Unfettered)
Now I own you
I will not ever just go away.
Now I own you
Don’t you ever again go astray.
And don’t tell me what to do
Don’t say what I can’t say
Now I am the one telling you
Don’t try to rein me in ‘cause
Now I own you
I will not ever just go away.
Now I own you
Don’t you ever again go astray.
I will tell you what to say
I will tell you what to do
Stay in line is all I ask
If you know what’s good for you.
I’m strong and I am never wrong
I’m free and you can’t touch me
I live my life the way I want
To lie and cheat with liberty.
I will tell you what to say
I will tell you what to do
Stay in line is all I ask
‘Cause you know now I own you.
